Scam and Spam

A two-parter

Part One: Scam

I have too many tabs open. For me too many is 25. I can’t live like this. They’re all open because I’m in this lull — public engagements are over for the year, I’ve finished a first draft of something, I’ve signed a contract for something else — and find myself in a what next mood.

One more factor responsible for the tabs: in six months’ time I will be fifty. A universally accepted what next milestone. Some of the tabs are about doing a Masters, which I got feverishly excited about one night. I’ve never done anything post-grad and used to do a pretty good impression of being clever. “I can’t, I’m busy doing a Masters” could be a more convincing excuse for not having a birthday party than the truthful “I hate parties”, which no one (my mother) is buying. So I worked out the general direction of my research question, opened numerous tabs for supervisors, saw 2025 as my year of taking myself seriously . . . clicked on an article about Master’s degrees being the biggest univ…